Definitely Not a Therapist
by The Calm Spy
Summary: Cassidy Scott has been living a pretty normal life since the fall of Shield. But, when she receives a letter from the Director, it's impossible for her not to answer his call. She wasn't too sure what to expect, but it surely wasn't Captain America looking for help. Now, she's in a foreign country doing research on a man she has tried very hard to forget. Better Summery inside
1. Chapter 1

_**Cassidy Scott has been living a pretty normal life since the fall of Shield. But, when she receives a letter from the Director, it's impossible for her not to answer his call. She wasn't too sure what to expect when she found herself meeting with Coulson, but it wasn't Captain America requesting someone to help his best friend. Now she's getting whisked off to Africa to help the same man who might as well be the reason she is still alive today.**_

 _ **Oh, and one more thing. She's not exactly a therapist.**_

* * *

 _ **Chapter I.  
**_

Cassidy liked to consider herself a pretty normal person. She had a normal job, lived in a normal place, grew up normal. Sure, her life itself hadn't always been, well, normal. But, that was the past and this was the present. A present where she lived only for herself and the stray cat that liked to hang out on her fire escape. Not for some super secret organization who sent her on weird, suicide missions, and asked her to experiment on weird alien type things.

She wasn't a Shield Agent.

Yet, the letter burning a hole in her pocket told her differently. According to it, she had never actually left, and they were allowed to call for her anytime they like. That wasn't what it actually said, but she got the gist of it. The strange man who had dropped it off had made sure she got the gist of it. She shuddered as she thought back to the slicked man sitting at the counter sipping on a cup of stale coffee. If she could go back in time, she would warn her past self to not make friendly conversation with the man as she busts the tables because it wasn't going to end well.

She stared up at the antique shop letting a lone chill run up her spine causing her to slightly shudder. She was still in her work clothes, a green shirt and a khaki apron, with regular blue jeans, and she smelled like baked goods. Why couldn't she of checked this place out on a weekend? Well, because the letter had said in case she was bored and Monday nights were always boring. She slipped a hand into the front pocket of her apron and brought out the letter. She didn't open it. She just fingered the material as she looked through the store window. In thick letters, the address of the shop was spelled out: '1759 Willow St.' Exactly where the letter told her to go. She took a deep breath and entered the small store.

There was an older woman standing behind the cash register. She greeted Cassidy with a small nod and continued whatever it was she was writing. Cassidy took a few moments to herself to look around the store before going up to the cashier.

"I'm a bit rusty at this," she admitted the woman. The woman looked up from what she was writing and smiled warmly at her.

"That's alright."

Cassidy was relieved she had finally told somebody what she had been thinking her entire journey to the shop. She wasn't an Agent anymore and she hadn't acted as one in over two years. She had found a nice, over expensive apartment, opened up a small business and settled into the somewhat peaceful life of a New Yorker. She was rusty at everything when it came to being some highly trained person. She even stopped working on her never ending thesis.

"Okay," Cassidy said. "Now that I've gotten that out of the way." She glanced around the store once more to make sure no one else was present and then with a big breath spoke, "I'm looking for a certain antique."

"We have lots to choose from," the woman said reaching for something behind the counter. Cassidy, for a small moment, panicked. At first she imagined the woman pulling out a gun, but then she rationalized that would be a little to showy and there might just be a button alerting some beefy dude hiding in the back of the shop.

She just walked into the trap.

Her fears were put to rest when instead the woman pulled out a small catalogue. "We also have an online store." Cassidy exhaled in relief as she grabbed the small catalogue.

"World War Two memorabilia, that's what I'm looking for."

"We have a great selection to choose from. Anything in particular?"

Cassidy mentally cringed as the next words left her mouth, "Captain America memorabilia." Coulson had, with no doubt, written the code. It had his uniqueness all over it.

"You're one of those, huh?" The woman chuckled. Cassidy smiled warily as the woman turned and disappeared into the back. She came back with a box in her hands. "This is all I have." She placed the box on the counter and slid it over to Cassidy.

Cassidy stood on her tiptoes so she could get a better look into the box. Okay, she thought to herself. What was she looking for again? There were an array of toy shields and helmets, trading cards, and were those underpants? She slipped the letter back into her pocket and reached a hand into the box sift around. She was looking for a small box. She pushed the toy shields aside, bingo.

"This is perfect," she said pulling out a small box covered with comic strips. She opened the small box to reveal a watch. She snorted to herself and set it down on the counter.

"Great choice," the older woman said grabbing the box and setting it down on the floor, behind the counter. Before she knew it, the wall to the back was sliding open revealing a huge eagle emblem. Apparently, they still weren't huge on subtleties. Cassidy breathed out as she turned to look at the woman. She gave Cassidy a reassuring nod before going and closing the front door blinds and locking the door. Cassidy took a deep breath and took a step towards the opening, but she faltered. Did she really want to do this? Her life was pretty good. It was sometimes boring, yes, but it was actually pretty good. Her fingers gripped the sides of her apron as she stepped closer.

She knew, deep down, she couldn't resist answering their call.

The door slid shut as soon as Cassidy stepped into the opening. A light appeared and scanned over her body before a beep sounded out. The floor began to rumble and the wall with the eagle slid open. She wasn't sure what to think when she stepped into the underground facility. People were milling around the place, all with their heads hung low and their minds probably on some specific task. She was certain they had noticed her but decided not to pay any attention to her sudden appearance.

"Hey," A voice greeted her. She turned to see a woman with short brown hair approaching her. The woman wore a mission suit and weird arm braces. "Did you just come out of that wall?"

Cassidy turned to see the wall had slid back into place. "Uh." She was trying to let everything soak in. "Yea?"

"Huh," the woman remarked stopping a few inched from her. She examined the wall with interest before turning to Cassidy. "Coulson sure knows how to plan a entrance."

"Yes, he does." Cassidy agreed nodding. The facility reminded her of the early years of Shield. Hiding in plain sight with store fronts and secret passage ways. Given, there had been a few of those during the more recent days as well. The walls were mostly brick, and the place seemed close knit, but open. Coulson had good taste.

"You look lost," the woman remarked kindly. "I'm Skye."

She was lost. She didn't even know why she was here in the first place. She remembered the letter she had received earlier that day and pulled it out of her pocket. She didn't know who this woman was, but she was the first one to notice Cassidy and she seemed alright.

Cassidy tried to explain herself but it came out in a jumble of words and unfinished sentences. "Just here," she said giving up. She held the letter out towards the woman who took it from her and unfolded it. The woman read it in silence, her lips moving as she did so.

"Let's get you to Coulson." The woman handed her the letter and motioned for her to follow. "He's going to want to see you."

 **A/N: I hope you all enjoyed the first chapter! I've had this story for a while now and I'm excited to finally be posting it. Anyway, I'll be posting the next chapter shortly, since I feel those first two are mainly set up and then a schedule will be set.**

 **What do you think?...Let me know by reviewing! Lillyxxx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter II.**

Cassidy nervously fiddled with her fingers as the woman, who introduced herself as Skye, led her to a decent sized office. She felt out of place among most of the agents milling around the hidden facility. Yet, there was a strange sense of nostalgia as she walked through the facility towards the office. People in mission suits running around, scientists in just as much as a hurry, people with their heads buried in files.

It felt like home.

Coulson greeted her with a warm hug that was at first strange, but welcomed. All previous formalities between them seemed to have been dropped. At least, to him they were. He greeted her like an old friend and she happily returned the gesture with a smile, and awkward pat on the back.

"Please," he said pulling away and motioning to the seats in front of his desk. "Sit." Coulson signaled the woman to leave and then rounded the black wood desk to take a seat into his chair.

Cassidy observed him as he did so. He looked much older than she remembered. Though, she hadn't seen him in a few good years, not since his 'death'. One of Coulson's hands was gloved, which she found odd since the other hand wasn't. Lastly, he carried himself with pride, authority, like a leader. Yet, there was something very tired that shone through his eyes. He wasn't the same man she remembered.

"I bet you are wondering why you are here," he said clasping his hands together and setting them on the desk.

"A little bit," she remarked grabbing the side of her apron and picking at the fabric. "I actually have a few questions."

"I'm sure you do and I hope to answer them in some time," he spoke calmly. "But, for now, I should get straight to the point. Time is of the essence."

He opened the drawer of his desk and pulled out a file. "Do you know who this is?" He asked as he slid the folder across the desk.

A chill ran down her spine as she picked up the file and cracked it open. A picture dropped out of a man that looked all too familiar. Her blood ran cold and an unnerving feeling welled in the pit of her stomach.

Cassidy only ever met the Winter Soldier once, and as scary as everyone made him out to be, the encounter was more strange than dangerous.

For her at least.

"Yea," she said with an unrecognizable tone. "Everyone knows who the Winter Soldier is." As the words left her mind a memory flashed through her mind. She shoved it into the deep abyss of her mind and swallowed thickly.

"He prefers Bucky now," a new voice offered from behind her. The newcomer caused her to jump in her seat. She set the file down in her lap and strained her neck around to see who the voice belonged to. The unnerving feeling in her stomach intensified as she locked eyes with the man. "Or James at least."

Steve Rogers stood tall in the doorway. The look on his face was one of curiosity and distrust. Cassidy tried not to pay mind to his guarded stature, but it made her swallow thickly once more and turned to face Coulson. The director looked somewhat amused with Cassidy's reaction. She narrowed her eyes at the older man and tried her best to keep her chin up as the super solder strode over to where they sat.

"Is she the one you were telling me about?" He asked looking between her and Coulson. Cassidy cleared her throat because ' _rude'_. She was sitting right there.

"Cassidy," she interrupted. His eyes rested on her, and all of her confidence seemed to drain away. He was more intimidating in person. She let her eyes scan over his body unknowingly.

 _Buffer too._

She didn't realize what she was doing until her eyes rested back on his face. She was met with a 'what are you doing' facial expression accompanied by a raised brow. She cleared her throat awkwardly and decided it best to face forward instead, away from the soldier's inquiring eyes.

"Captain," Coulson said entering the sad excuse for a conversation. "This is Cassidy Scott, and yes, she is the one I was telling you about." He looked over at Cassidy, a faint smile playing on his lips. "Cassidy, I'm sure you are familiar with Captain Rogers."

"Very," she said. It came out as more of squeak. She mentally slapped herself and reminded herself it was key to breathed.

"It's nice to meet you," Steve offered, his voice coming out a little softer.

She stole a glance at him and nodded as if to say, 'nice to meet you too.' and then faced forward again. If she wasn't such a big fan of Captain America, things would probably be going a lot smoother, but she was.

So, things were doomed from the start.

"I'm sure Coulson has filled you in on-"

"I was actually getting to that," Coulson interrupted.

The two men shared a private look, which confused Cassidy, before Steve nodded at him. "I guess I'll leave you to it, then."

He gave her a curt nod before turning and exiting the room. As he did so, Coulson let a low chuckle slip out. Cassidy narrowed her eyes at the man and looked down at the file in her lap, a chill ran down her spine once more.

"I didn't know you were such a fan," Coulson finally remarked after a moment of silence, like he was waiting for Steve to leave the vicinity entirely.

"I'm more of an Iron Man kind of girl," she remarked trying to play off her initial star struck. "But, I guess, anyone would be struck meeting Captain America so suddenly."

"I'll give you a heads up next time." He chuckled once more.

"Why am I here?" She asked sharply. It came out harsher than expected, but she assumed Coulson got the hint because her cleared his throat and moved on.

"I need a favor," he grimaced as the words left his mouth. "And you're not going to like it."

* * *

 **A/N: It's short, I know, but the chapters will be longer after this. I'm planning on posting on Thursdays and hopefully that will work out. Also, I have another story on here (It's Complicated). If you haven't read it, check it out if you like. Anyway, I will still be posting new chapters on that one as well, but my schedule for that is a little wonky at the moment. So, no need to fear I am still continuing that story. Lastly, but most importantly, a shout out to those who have, faved, followed, and reviewed! Thank you so much! I really appreciate it!**

 **What do you think?...Let me know by reviewing! Lillyxxx**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter III.**

Cassidy urged the knot in her stomach to go away, but despite her efforts, it still twisted in the pit of her stomach. Her body tingled with anxiety and something else she couldn't quite put her finger on, but it was certainly not a good feeling. Her nerves were shot and the bumpy plane ride was beginning to make her feel nauseous.

"Do you want a doggy bag or something?" The man, who introduced himself as Sam, asked. He was seated next to her

She couldn't tell if he was joking or not, but after forcing herself to look at him, she made note of the serious look on his face and decided he was in fact, dead serious. She swallowed the lump in her throat and shook her head 'no'.

Cassidy was having trouble understanding why on earth she felt so bent about the current situation. She had been in more stressful scenarios before. But, here she was, sick to her stomach.

"Are you sure?" Sam asked raising an eyebrow.

Just as she was about to shake her head again the plane jumped abruptly. Her stomach did a flip and before another word could be uttered, she was out of her seat and running in search for the nearest restroom.

"It's the small door near the cockpit," he yelled after her.

Cassidy would've thanked him, but she was too busy trying to hold down her lunch.

She was almost home free, but alas, all the odds were to be against her. She was stopped, inches away from the bathroom, by Steve.

"Listen," he said putting a hand up to stop her as she attempted to slip through. She tightened the hand around her mouth and motioned to the bathroom door behind him, but he didn't seem to be getting the signal. "I think we go off on the wrong foot," the look on his face told her that Steve was intent on talking. "I appreciate you coming-"

The plane jolted again and before he could get another word in, Cassidy was doubled over emptying the contents of her stomach. She wiped her mouth and groaned out loud when she realized she let the mess go on the man's shoes. She stood upright and placed a feeble hand on her stomach.

"I-" she glanced at his face momentarily to see the slightly horrified, slightly disgusted look on his face. She averted eyes when he finally looked at her. "I'm sorry," she choked out stepping over the mess and pushing past him.

Once in the bathroom, she locked the door and groaned to herself. There was no way in heck she was going back out there. Cassidy leaned her back against the door and slowly slid down to the floor.

 **####**

 _"I'm not a therapist," Cassidy remarked closing the file in her hands. She looked up at Coulson to see him grimacing at her._

 _"I know you aren't," he replied._

 _Coulson cleared his throat and leaned back into his chair. "The way Steve described the situation, he doesn't a need a therapist, he needs someone smart enough to fix the problem and dedicated enough to never give up."_

 _"That sounds like a therapist to me," she scoffed setting down the file in her lap. "I'm sure it won't be too hard to find one either."_

 _"This requires a more scientific mind," Coulson cut in. His voice carrying more authority than before. "It's less about emotion and more about what he was programmed to be and if push comes to shove, I'm sure you won't have too much trouble talking to him about feelings."_

 _"I still don't-"_

 _"Listen, I know it's hard to explain, but when he described the situation, my mind instantly went to you and your work with Mr. Banner."_

 _Cassidy bit down on her lip as she thought over the job. Sure, she had talked to Banner, but that was a different story and it was on friendly terms. Something told her this wasn't just because of that._

 _"Is this about-" she paused unsure on how to word it. "The incident?"_

 _"He needs our help," his voice dropped a few volumes. "But, I can't send someone in there knowing they may end up-"_

 _She sighed in defeat knowing he was right about one thing, but there was a slim chance that whatever happened would ever happen again._

 _It was still dangerous._

 _Coulson let a smile cross his face that she was likely going to agree. "I'll tell Steve to get the plane."_

 _"Plane?"_

 **####**

Cassidy sat there for who knows how long before a knock came from the other side of the door. "Hey," a male voice said. It sounded familiar, but she couldn't quite put her finger on why. "Are you okay in there?"

"Yea," she replied shakily. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" She could hear the amusement in the man's voice. "Because the vomit on Cap's shoes say differently."

There was only one man she knew who would laugh at a situation like this. She stood from the floor and rubbed her palms on her apron. She then unlocked the door and slid it open. On the other side stood Clint, leaning against the door frame.

"Clint," she said with a slight nod. A wave of relief washed over her as she looked at the man.

"Cassidy," he said mimicking her. "Ready to go back out there, champ?"

She stuck her head out and peered down the hall. Some unlucky fellow stood above, what used to be a puddle of something unruly with dust mask on, gloves and a trash bag in hand. She felt something pang in her heart. She felt guilty for leaving the mess for someone else to clean up.

"It's okay," the man said. She must have been staring. He removed the dust mask and took in a deep breath. "I used to work at Dunkin Doughnuts. I'm Scott by the way," he gave her a warm smile.

"Hi Scott?" She said with hesitance. The plane lurched forward.

"I think we're landing," Clint said. "We should probably strap in."

The plane lurched again and Cassidy felt her stomach do a turn. "I think I'll stay in the bathroom," she said as she attempted to slide the door shut. Clint stuck his foot in the way to prevent her from doing so.

"Not today," he said grabbing her arm and pulling her out into the hall. She stumbled out and placed a hand on the wall for balance. "You know," he said shaking his head. "You used to be a lot more bad ass."

She rolled her eyes at his comment. "It's been a while," she defended.

"Two years," he confirmed with a nod. "Only two years."

Yea, well a lot happened. She bit her tongue before she could say another word and silently huffed. He wouldn't understand. Her 'super spy gene' had been turned off and she doubted it would ever be turned on again.

"Did you make it to the bathroom?" Sam asked as she slipped into a seat. She shook her head 'no' and left it at that. "Okay," he said with an awkward chuckle.

* * *

Cassidy couldn't feel more out of place.

She climbed off the plane only after everyone else. She for one, felt gross because of the disgusting taste in her mouth and secondly, felt really hot because she was dressed for early spring, not for the heat of a thousand suns. In other words, Wakanda was _hot_.

"This is it," Steve said falling into step with her. She nodded silently, with her face towards the ground. She was unsure on how exactly she was going to come back from the incident on the plane. She looked up momentarily, they locked eyes, and the already humid air seemed to thicken. It was evident it would take a while to prove she wasn't some air sick weakling. "Um-" Steve said. A hand shot to the back of his neck and he seemed baffled. "Let me show you where you'll be staying."

He quickened his pace leaving her to follow him. Cassidy told herself to get a handle on things, and followed the man. She also told herself the only reason her face was red was because it was really, really hot outside.

She looked up at the facility and felt a jolt of excitement. The building was sleek. It seemed futuristic compared to the forestry surrounding the place. She glanced back to where the plane landed. In the distance, strange looking buildings poked out from behind the tress. Apparently, there were a lot of things here.

Cassidy had never really heard of Wakanda. Mostly, because it was rarely in the news. Sure, she knew Captain America's shield was made from vibranium. Said vibranium came from a meteorite that crashed in the small country Wakanda a long time ago. But, that was standard knowledge for any level four agent and she was level six, or at least she used to be.

What the agency failed to tell their agents was that Wakanda was way more advanced than any other civilization out there, and she knew this just from the buildings sitting in the horizon.

It was the inner scientist in her that was getting so worked up.

At the door stood a tall, dark skinned man. He stood tall and may have been around the same height as Steve, but seemed to tower over her far more than the blonde. Steve nodded at the man first before stepping aside to reveal Cassidy. She swallowed thickly as she approached.

"You must be Cassidy," the man greeted. His accent was thick, but understandable. "I am T'Challa, king of Wakanda."

Dear lord.

"Um-" she said unsure on what to say. One moment she was baking cookies, the next she was meeting the freaking king of Wakanda?

"Yea," a voice cut in, answering for her. She turned to see Clint coming behind them. "She's a little shy." A smile played on his lips as he glanced over at her.

Cassidy bit back a rude remark and huffed. "I'm really not," she said speaking up. "Um-" she offered her hand. "It's nice to meet you, uh-"

"T'Challa will do just fine," he said accepting her hand. For a split second he almost look amused, but quickly put on a serious front as Steve addressed the man she was supposed to be helping.

Hopefully," Steve said crossing his arms. "She'll be able to help us."

He momentarily glanced at Cassidy with an indifferent look on his face before grimacing back at the king. _Well then._ She took in a deep breath and turned to Clint who was standing beside her. His arms were crossed, his eyebrows drawn together. Even though he wasn't offering anything to the conversation between the two men, he seemed to be listening intently.

"Of course, and we will find you something to change into as well." Cassidy snapped out of her thoughts and turned to see the king of Wakanda eying her up and down before turning and whispering something to the woman standing behind him. She wasn't exactly sure on what he meant, but she didn't like the unfriendly look the woman gave her.

She looked down at her clothes and suddenly felt a bit self conscience. She was still in her work uniform, which wouldn't be too bad if she didn't have cake batter splattered over the front of her apron, and who knows what was in her hair, and there was always something in her hair.

She smoothed down the front of the apron as if it would help and couldn't help but send Clint a glare as he quietly chuckled beside her.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter. IV**

* * *

"We've been working on him for some time now," T'Challa explained as he led Cassidy through the labs. "But, I am unable to dedicate all of my time to helping the Captain's friend."

The two stopped at a fingerprint locked door. T'Challa ran a finger across the finger swipe docked to the side. He took a step back as the door unlocked with a small click. "With even the aide of my scientists, it is proving longer than expected," he continued without missing a beat.

"And I'm here to help….?"

"The Director of Shield, as I'm told, spoke highly of you." He led her through the door after it opened with a click. The man didn't offer much after that. Cassidy nodded, only half listening to everything was he saying. She tuned him out completely as her eyes fell on a very familiar looking arm.

"Is that?"

"It's just one of the many prototypes we have," T'Challa replied with a small wave at it. Cassidy turned to see T'Challa staring down at her. There was no malice in his eyes, but maybe a hint of- distrust?

"Let me show you."

Cassidy's mind was running a thousand miles a minute as he led he rover to the capsule. She felt a chill run down her spine as she took a step foreword.

There he was.

Cassidy stepped up to the capsule holding the assassin in cryo. "He looks," she paused looking for the right words. "Peaceful."

"As peaceful as he can be not knowing the next time he'll be let out," a voice opted in. Both T'Challa and Cassidy turned to see Steve approaching them.

"I just meant- I, uh, mean." She couldn't help but feel like she had said something stupid, silly. Of course the man couldn't be peaceful.

"I know," he said with a slight nod. "But, I think he'd be a lot more peaceful if he wasn't stuck in some tank."

"And you know that for sure?" Cassidy questioned before she could stop herself.

"No, but, I like to think I do."

She turned back to the frozen man. His eyes were closed and his features showed no sign of distress. He looked calm and one thing was for sure. He looked a lot better than the last time she saw him, less tortured.

"He's in cryostasis," T'Challa explained from behind her. "Which means he is-"

"Pretty much frozen," Cassidy finished for him, mindlessly. Her eyes darted around her face and then lowered. She settled on a nub, where a arm was supposed to be attached.

"From what we have gathered," T'Challa continued. "Hydra would unfreeze him when needed, but keep him in a tank similar to the current one he is in, when he wasn't."

"They would use words to program him," Steve added.

"So, freezing him would undo their brainwashy type thing?" She turned to face the two man and was met with a couple of raised eyebrows. "You know the iron grip they had."

"He was still somewhat under their control, yes, but- Let's just say their was a little more Bucky and a little less Winter Soldier."

"Since he's been on the run for sometime now," T'Challa cut in. "They do not have the same control, but unfortunately, those words are still planted in his head."

"So, if someone were to get a hold of those words-"

"Someone already has. Which is why we need to find a way to undo whatever Hydra did before-"

"Someone else figures out the magic words aren't just please and thank you," Cassidy said cutting Steve off like he had done with her.

She ignored the look Steve threw her way and focused her attention on the monitors sitting behind the soldier. "What are those?" She asked sliding past Steve before either of the men could answer.

"These," T'Challa said coming up beside her. "Are for another day."

Cassidy couldn't help but let out a disappointed sigh as the man called out for someone in his native language. "Well," she breathed out as she ran a finger along the outside of the monitor.

At least she had something to look forward too.

* * *

"You know Clint."

Steve and Cassidy walked side by side down a decent sized stretch of hall. They were accompanied by two, very serious looking women. Ones, T'Challa had explained to be warriors. Steve's comment, although she would've preferred worded as a question, came out in an accusing, interrogative way. It was a tone that didn't sit well with her. His eyes were focused on the unoccupied hall in front of them, not on her. She glanced sideways at him.

"We have briefly worked together," she said passively waving off her annoyance. He nodded silently with a small hum and they fell silent. It was only after a few minutes passed when Steve opened his mouth to speak again.

"It's just that-" He paused, like he was trying to piece together the sentence in his mind. Cassidy took a deep breath and swallowed down every sarcastic thought coursing through her mind. If he had been anyone else, and this any other situation, she may let her true thoughts shine through. But, this man was as serious as the predicament she was in. "I thought you worked in the labs," he offered. "At least that's what Coulson told me."

"For the last leg of my career," she replied honestly. "I worked as a scientist, but I was originally trained as a field agent."

"So, you and Clint-" he paused again. "You've been on missions together?"

"Like I said, a few." It was an understatement. She had been on a lot of missions with Clint, but that was unimportant. "Though, I don't see how that has any value here."

They fell silent again.

Cassidy couldn't help but think, 'how awkward is this?' If you didn't count the incident on the plane, and she didn't, this was the first conversation the two had exchanged, just them, and it wasn't going ideally. She resigned to picking at the side of her apron and stealing glances at the man beside her. She grew up learning about the all American guy, who threw a shield like no one else's business. But, that wasn't the man walking beside her.

Steve Rogers, although a super soldier, was only human, and humans can only go so far.

"So, uh-" she let go of her apron. "About James." It sounded weird referring to the Winter Soldier as James. Because, even though seeing him look so peaceful in cryo should've been proof enough, the fact he had a name, made the solder seem like an actual human being.

For the first time since the two had begun walking, Steve looked over at her. He stopped mid-step and spun to face her, causing her to stop in her tracks as well. She bit down on her tongue as Steve scanned over her. Cassidy now understood how uncomfortable he must of felt as she, openly, had a good look at him back at the Shield facility.

It was like he was looking for something, something she doubted he would find. Especially, with her. Cassidy didn't consider herself unattractive, but she wasn't something to look at either. It was just a known fact, there were more attractive women out there. She was the spitting image of her grandmother and although her grandma was a real beauty during her younger years, and still had been, Cassidy didn't know how to play to her more attractive traits as much. His eyes finally settled on her and she found herself unable to look away.

"What did you say your last name was?"

"Um-" she said gulping. Her stomach knotted up as he looked down at her with distant eyes.

"I never told you my name, Coulson- did." She instantly regretted her 'know it all' statement. "Scott."

Steve tore his gaze away from her eyes and looked down at nothing particular. His eyes focused, burning a hole into the floor, and he drew his eyebrows together. He wasn't glaring, per say. Cassidy decided that Steve just had really serious thinking face.

She couldn't help but wonder what exactly her was thinking about.

Suddenly, she became aware of the fact there was a woman on either side of them and grew hot in the face. There was no doubt they were watching the awkward exchange. "I hope you aren't going to judge my usefulness on how well my last name goes with my first."

Cassidy's words snapped Steve out of his thinking trance. He glanced back at her, purposely missing her eyes and turned. "Of course not," he answered starting again at a quick pace. Cassidy followed his suit, trying her best to keep up. "I'm sure you're tired. We can talk about Bucky tomorrow."

* * *

Cassidy wiped the condensation off the mirror in front of her with the towel she used to dry her hair. It left the mirror with water streaks, but she could see clearly enough to get a good look at herself. She let out a content sigh and took a step back to get a better view and man did she look tired. The bags under her eyes were stood out, and her face was still slightly flushed from vomiting earlier. Her eyes were dull, face in a permanent frown, her hair still contained remnants of a cake batter incident from earlier in the day. She figured it would take some time to fully get everything out of her hair, though.

She dried herself the rest of her body off in silence, put on her undergarments, and then slipped on the clothes that had been folded neatly on her bed for her. She decided the shirt was a little too baggy for her taste as she pulled her arms through the sleeves and let the rest of the shirt fall over her torso, but she deemed it inappropriate to complain. After all, at least it was better than her work shirt, which forever held the stench of baked goods. She rolled her eyes at herself and pulled on the sweats which thank goodness, had a draw string to adjust the size. Cassidy wasn't a real skinny girl, but the clothes seemed to be made for someone much bigger than her, perhaps a man.

She gathered her things off the floor and entered the bedroom. It was kind of cool having a bathroom off of the bedroom. In her apartment, she was forced to go down the hall, and to the left, and it wasn't the kind of journey she enjoyed taking in the middle of the night. She stuffed the used clothes in the laundry hamper sitting outside the bathroom door and immediately took to the bed.

It was a big mattress, covered with fluffy blankets. She was thankful for the coolness of the room. She no longer felt like she would melt into a puddle of goop because of the heat. Cassidy pulled the blankets back and settled into bed with a satisfied hum. As she drifted off to sleep, Cassidy was, for the first time, not regretting her decision to tag along for the ride. Because, she was currently laying in the most comfortable bed she ever had the pleasure of sleeping in.

* * *

 **A/N: Okay! So, Thursdays don't seem to be working out. I honestly haven't found time to post and things will be tight seeing the school is starting up again. I will post when I can and, hopefully, try to figure things out. Anyway, here's the fourth chapter. I hope you all enjoyed it.  
**

 **What did you think?...Let me know my reviewing! Lillyxox**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter V.  
**

* * *

 _Her fingers tugged at his hair gently. The sensation was something different. Something unfamiliar to Steve, but so relaxing. Her soft perfume overloaded his senses and calmed his heart as her nails gently grazed his scalp. It caused him to hum in comfort and tilt his head upwards in attempts to savor the feeling. His eyelids grew heavy and his breathing slowed. Steve let out a tired sigh and settled his head deeper into her lap, turning to bury his face into her stomach. The feeling welling in the pit his stomach, as he dozed off was something he hadn't felt in such a long time._

 _He felt at home._

 _There was none of the weight of other men's lives on his shoulders. There was no stress about important decisions, and battle plans. It was just she and him, in silence, in comfort. It just felt right. As he finally closed his eyes and took one more sleepy sigh, the moment ended. Much to Steve's disappointment._

 _The door opened and in came Stark, with Bucky not that far behind. He felt her hands retreat, leaving him with the sensation of her fingers still tangled in his hair. Steve shot up shaken by the sudden noise and immediately went into defense mode._

 _"Am I interrupting?" Howard question putting on a cocky grin and leaning against one of the many lab tables._

 _The moment was gone. Steve huffed in disappointment and settled back onto the bench, sitting upright. It was no longer just she and him. The real world had now snuck into their (his) comfort. He was no longer home. He was in the shabby excuse of research lab, sitting in the middle of barracks._

 _"No," she answered standing. "I was just talking to Rogers."_

 _Steve caught her eyes and that strange feeling disappeared. They were back to last name basis again. He turned away and caught the eyes of Bucky, which was inquiring a lot at the moment.  
_

 _"I actually was looking for you," he said turning to Stark. "I wanted to know if you had any new weapons for our mission."_

 _"Right this way," Howard said holding out his arm to show the way. Steve straightened out his uniform and followed Stark to the back. He zoned Howard out as he began talking and stole a look at her. She was now busying herself with papers on Howard's desk. She offered a warm smile to Bucky as he passed by, and gave her a nod. In this war torn place, he was lucky he found her._

 _Home._

Steve was beside himself. He sat at the edge of his bed, hair soppy from sweat, breathing quick. He needed to do something to take his mind off of things. He needed to get out of there. Everything was beginning to pile onto him, leaving no room to breathe. He was suffocating.

The avengers were done for, Bruce was missing, Stark was gone, and Bucky was alive and brainwashed. He didn't even have the words to describe the what he felt at the moment.

Steve stood from his bed and quickly dressed in some workout gear. Maybe some exercise would do him some good. He hadn't been on a morning run in forever. He checked the clock sitting on the nightstand as he slipped on his shoes. One o'clock was morning enough.

* * *

 **Cassidy**

Cassidy felt compelled to ask the blonde if he was alright, but seemingly decided against it as the man set down his cup of coffee with a loud 'clunk'. She sat across from Steve, who was glaring daggers into the mahogany table, uncomfortably. She felt like she should say something, but was afraid to say the wrong thing. The man already didn't seem too fond of her. But, of course Cassidy didn't think upon opening her mouth.

"So, you said we could talk about Bucky in the morning." This initially caught Steve attention. He slowly looked up and she noted the unreadable look in his eyes. Steve wasn't angry, but he didn't look too happy either. "Since I'm going to be working with him and all," she quickly followed.

The super soldier sighed deeply and pushed back from the table. He looked like he wanted to say something, but quickly refrained. Cassidy fell silent as the man poured himself a fresh cup of coffee with a dejected look on his face.

She decided to bite.

"Are you okay?" She asked breaking the silence. Steve looked over at her like he had forgotten she was sitting there. He quickly covered his astonishment and sighed.

"I'm fine," he said evenly. "There's not much about Bucky I can tell you that you probably don't already know. You watch the news, right?"

Cassidy sighed and regretted even bothering. She pushed back from the table and stood. "I guess you're right," she muttered grabbing her breakfast dishes. After quickly discarding them in the sink, she hurried out of the kitchen and away from the super soldier. She felt like there was something going on, that was going way over her head. The way Steve looked at her. It was a mixture of sadness, and anger? Maybe regret? But, that was the thing. She had never met the man previous to now. So, it puzzled her further.

She hurried away from the kitchen, trying to force down the lump in her throat. She really needed to get a hold of herself. She ran a frustrated hand down her face and mumbled a few choice words under her breath. This was all too complicated for her.

 **####**

Cassidy picked at her thumb in complete silence. She dangled her feet over the edge of the rock ledge and looked down at the water beneath her. Pieces of memories flashed through her mind as she watched the water move back and forth.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

Cassidy didn't jump at the voice. She heard someone climbing over the rocks, minutes before whoever it was had finally spoke. She turned her head around the see Sam standing there with his hands shoved in his pockets. He held a sheepish smile on his face, like he was unsure of something.

"Only a penny?" She asked as she forced a smile onto her face. She didn't know much about Sam given the two had barely spoke, but he had a friendly aura to him.

He blew out some air and sat down next to her. "I'm sorry, but I have never paid more than a penny for someone's thoughts."

She let out a slight laugh and slid her hands under her legs. "I was just thinking," she said shrugging slightly. "It's been a while since I've done something this crazy."

"I can tell." Sam scoffed which caused her to cast a look at him. "You just seem really anxious, that's all."

"I am really anxious," she remarked looking back down at the water. "Can I ask you a question?"

The thought just seemed to suddenly pop into her head as she replayed the previous day's happenings. It was something that gnawed at her all through the night, and during breakfast. When he didn't answer, she continued.

"What is he like?"

Sam remained silent for a moment. "Well," he finally said. "I honestly haven't really known Cap for that long but,-"

"No," she said quickly stopping him. "Not him, the Winter Soldier or Bucky."

She let out a bitter laugh and shook her head. "Sorry, it's just that last time we met well-" She stopped and bit down on her lip. Did she really want to talk about this with some guy she barely just met? She glanced over to Sam and saw him staring at her.

"Guess you don't have any good history with the guy." He remarked scanning her.

"Not exactly," she said with a sigh. "No."

"It must be hard, having all of this happen to you so suddenly." He seemed really sincere with words.

"Yea," she said looking away from him. "It is."

Sam sighed deeply and cleared his throat. "Well," he said scratching the back of his head. "I really don't see what's so big about the guy, but Steve seems to think he's some gosh given gift. They were pretty close growing up, but you probably already know that." Sam paused for moment.

Cassidy raised an eyebrow at Sam. "So, does that mean he's not like- you know."

"Oh no," Sam said with a scoff. "He got his ass handed to him by a kid in spandex."

"Not what I meant," Cassidy giggled. "But that kind of makes him seem less scary."

Sam chuckled and looked out at the waterfall. "I guess I don't really understand what's going through Roger's mind right now, but I can tell you this. He's nearly given everything up for Bucky and that's a lot. Although I may not like him, I have to admit, he's pretty special to Steve."

"You don't like Bucky?" Cassidy asked creasing her eyebrows together.

"Hell no," Sam said his voice rising a bit, in a comical way. "Do you know what I've been through because of him? He's not a very considerate backseat person either _and_ he's tried to kill me, I don't know how many times." Sam scoffed. "Trust me when I tell you, he's damn worth it, 'cause otherwise there are going to be some serious problems."

Cassidy stifled a laugh and turned back to the water. "I guess I should probably get to work then, huh?"

"Yea, maybe." Sam said with a slight sigh. "Just give me a few days notice before you unfreeze him."

"Unfreeze him?"

* * *

A/N: I would like to thank everyone who has subscribed and reviewed! I really, really appreciate it and I want you all to know it does not go unnoticed. Anyway, steering away from the slight sappiness, I hope you all enjoyed this chapters. Also, some of the characters in the story, I'm writing for the first time. So, I'm sorry if some of them seem a little out of character. I'm working on it. On a bright note, we are slowly starting to see a few things unfold, what's gonna happen next? Continue reading to find out!

What did you think?...Let me know by reviewing! LillyXx


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter VI.**

* * *

Cassidy felt like the world was on her shoulders. She observed from the sidelines as the scientists worked around her, conducting a series of tests on the frozen solider. She couldn't help but feel sorry for the man. They seemed to treat him more like a lab rat, than an actual human being. She felt a tang of protectiveness as one of the scientists looked over at her and huffed. She scoffed at the scientists and crossed her arms in a slightly childish way. She did not come all the way out here to be treated like a stupid being.

Her eyes fell on T'Challa, who was discussing some file with a woman. He must have sensed her eyes because as soon as her eyes focused on him, he looked up. The king offered curt nod before averting his eyes back down to the file. Cassidy felt heat splash across her face as she swallowed thickly and looked else where. She sighed deeply and uncrossed her arms. She felt the need to touch everything within her line of sight, and there was a lot of stuff in her line of sight. Cassidy ignored the tingle in her fingertips and resided to picking at her thumbs.

As another scientist threw her a weary look, Cassidy couldn't help but wonder if it was the clothes she was wearing. She glanced down at the sleep wrinkled sweats, baggy shirt, and clenched her jaw. She really needed to find something else to change in and quick. She didn't feel very dignified dressed as a bum. Cassidy let out a resided sigh and forced herself to leave her thumb alone. She glanced over at T'Challa once more to see him completely immersed in his conversation and quickly decided she was not going to stand around and 'observe'. She needed something to do, and quickly. She gravitated towards the metal arm that was surrounded by a clear casing. She placed a hand on the clear glass and sighed. Cassidy was interested in the way the arm worked. Though, she had seen it in action before, popping it open and looking at the mechanics was an entirely different thing. Knowing how it worked, and understanding how it worked were two very different things.

"It's an interesting piece of technology." An accented voice said breaking into Cassidy's thoughts. A woman donning a lab coat like the rest of the men in the room came up beside her. Cassidy quickly withdrew her hand and looked at the woman in fear that she might yell at her for touching the casing. The woman in turn smiled at Cassidy warmly and placed her hand on the casing. A hand scan appeared and Cassidy watching in disbelief as the casing disappeared into the podium the arm was set on.

"Would you like to see how it works?" The woman asked picking up the arm and walking towards one of the lab counters. Cassidy nodded a bit confused by the woman's friendliness. "From what I have heard," she said as she set the arm down and turned to face Cassidy. "You are here to help us solve this."

"That's what I've been told, yea." Cassidy replied wearily as she stepped beside the woman.

"My name is A'kane," the woman said offering her hand to shake. "And I know vibranium better than I know myself." She said turning to the arm. "It is my job to design and build a new arm," she said picking up the arm once more and offering it to Cassidy. "And from what I've also heard, you know your way around a laboratory."

Cassidy slowly took the arm from the woman, a bit astounded.

"Tell me what you think."

She looked down at the hand. It was carved so meticulously. It looked almost lifelike She ran a thumb over the fingernails and wrinkles along the fingers. Cassidy moved on to the actual arm and made note of the evident muscles carved out. As she reached the very top of the arm, she noticed a small button, barely seen. Glancing over to A'kane for permission first, she pushed the small button.

The arm transformed in front of her eyes. She was holding what looked like a human arm and what felt like a human arm. "This is amazing," Cassidy breathed out pushing the button again and watching it change back to vibranium.

"It's just a cloaking device," A'kane replied grabbing the arm back. "An illusion if you will. To him, I doubt it would ever feel like a real arm." She said walking over to the podium and placing the arm back. "But to the outside, it would be." The casing reappeared around the arm as soon as it was placed down on the podium.

Cassidy thought back to what Sam had said earlier, about taking him out of cyro. "Are they really going to unfreeze him?" A'kane looked up from the arm and seemed some what astonished by her question.

"We are not certain," she heard T'Challa say. Cassidy turned around to see him approaching them. "Who told you we were going to take him out of cyro?" The man stopped in front of her and looked into her eyes with uncertainty. Cassidy had a sudden feeling that she had just asked the wrong question. T'Challa seemed to be calculating something as he scanned her face.

"I heard one of the scientists talking about it, that's all." She replied letting out an awkward chuckle. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry, just a bit curious."

He looked away from her, past her shoulder and motioned A'kane to leave. She silently slipped past the two and began to busy herself with something else.

"Come with me," T'Challa said leading her away from the labs. She followed him obediently.

Once they exited the labs he turned to her and began speaking. "The director has dropped off some things for you," he said as he lead her down the hall. "I've already had the Dora to check it, so it is now in your room."

She creased her eyebrows together and looked at him strangely. "Why would they need to check it?" She asked a bit insulted.

He sighed deeply and turned to look forward. "I know it seems as though we do not trust you," he said placing his hands behind his back as he walked. "But you must understand, we have to be careful. There are a lot people out there who want to get their hands on The Winter Soldier. None of which are any good."

"I understand," Cassidy nodded. "But, if you want my help, I am going to need you trust me even the littlest bit. I feel like everyone is tiptoeing past me, wary. I can't work like that."

"In due time," T'Challa nodded and they fell silent. She hadn't even realized where they were going, until he stopped in front of her bedroom door. "Take some time to unpack," he said stepping aside for her. "Don't worry about the labs anymore for today. Tomorrow, I'll have one of my scientists get you started."

She nodded silently and grabbed the doorknob. She opened the door and stepped in.

"And Cassidy," T'challa said before she closed the door behind her. "It has been brought to my attention, you may feel a bit uncomfortable around Captain Rogers." Cassidy opened her mouth to deny it, but couldn't seem to. Geez, was it that obvious? She wasn't just imagining it? "I wouldn't take it personally," T'Challa said. "He's been through a lot."

Cassidy nodded slowly, unsure on how else to respond.

"We all have."

The sadness in his eyes was evident, but she decided not to press. She heard about the death of his father, everyone had.

"I'll keep that in mind," she replied awkwardly.

T'Challa nodded at her and left, leaving her there with his words. Cassidy sighed and closed the door. Her suitcases sat, stacked neatly in front her bed.

"Coulson, I could just kiss you." She muttered to herself as she pulled them around her bed and began to go through them.

She found a letter tucked into one of the folds of her suitcases. She pulled it out and turned it over. There was no sign of it being read, but she doubted it had went untouched. She opened it and pulled out the letter inside of it.

" _Cassidy_ ," she mumbled as she began to read it. _"Thought you may need some things,_ " she rolled her eyes at Coulson's words and scanned over the rest of the letter. It pretty much told her what she already figured. All loose ends back in New York had been tied until return. All she had to worry about was her 'task.' She set the letter aside and checked to see if anything else was hiding in the small fold. They way Coulson put it, it sounded as if she was one of his agents, and she wasn't. Her fingers brushed by something thick.

Aha.

She pulled out thick vanilla folder and sighed as she read the file's name, which was scrawled in her messy handwriting. "You shouldn't have," she muttered woefully. It was definitely thicker than she remembered, but she guessed the file grew the more people learned about Mr. Winter Soldier. She settled back onto the bed and opened the file, careful to not let anything fall out. She quickly realized that the papers staring at her weren't Shield issued case reports.

Cassidy's breath caught in her throat as she pulled out the extra cases. "You really shouldn't of," she said as she crossed her legs and stared down at the papers. In the matter of seconds the weight of the world grew about one thousand pounds heavier. There was no doubt T'Challa knew. The Dora had inspected her suitcases after all, but Steve. She jumped as a sudden knock came from the door.

"Who is it," she asked trying her best to keep a steady voice.

"Clint."

Cassidy was already scrambling to hide the file. She, in a state of panic, just shoved it back in her suitcase and then pushed it under the bed. She took a deep breath and hurried to open the door.

"Hey," she greeted leaning against the doorway. He looked at her strangely, but thankfully didn't ask.

"I was going to train for a bit," he said letting his eyebrows fall. "I figured-"

"Oh no," Cassidy replied feeling anxious. She hadn't done any real 'training' since she retired as a field agent, since the incident. "I haven't- I haven't really done anything in such a long time."

"Now's a good time as any to start again," he said offering a slight shrug. "I'll go easy on you."

"I don't know," she said slightly readjusting herself under his gaze. She averted his eyes and looked over his shoulder at nothing in particular. An anxious feeling began to swell in her stomach and she felt her hands begin to shudder slightly. She quickly made clenched her hands and looked back at Clint. "Maybe some other time."

He nodded understandingly, and didn't press further. "Suit yourself," he said turning to leave. She closed the door and slowly sat back down on the bed, letting out a shaky breath. She buried her head into her heads and let out another breath.

"Why couldn't I of just chosen a normal job?" She asked to herself as she tried to calm herself down. If she never joined Shield, she wouldn't be where she was at the moment. Her mind wandered to the thick file, hidden in one of her suitcases, under the bed. She wasn't sure if Steve knew what she now knew, but she sure as heck wasn't going to be the one who told him.

All she wanted to do right now, was forget everything.

* * *

 **A/N:** What did you think?...Let me know by reviewing! LillyXx...and Happy Holidays!


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter VII.**

* * *

Cassidy was hunched over the computer. Her fingers flying around in the air as she typed on the hovering keyboard. She stood in a bathrobe wrapped tightly around her body, a pair of green fuzzy slippers on her feet, and her hair thrown in an up do that slowly came undone while she was sleeping. Her mind was racing, several thoughts fighting for her attention all at once. It was warzone inside of her head.

She paused for a moment at the sound of the far lab door opening. She turned with her mouth slightly agape and listened quietly, but heard no footsteps follow. Cassidy pressed her lips into a thin line and glanced back at the frozen solider. For a split second, her mind was off in some far place and she was back inside a disheveled office room, that was half on fire and full on chaos. She shook that thought away and turned back to the computer.

It had been a good few weeks since she decided to travel to Wakanda. She was now acclimated to the labs and the people who worked in them perfectly fine. As fine as an outsider could be, she guessed. Most of the time, she had free range of the place, but it was so busy during regular hours, she couldn't keep her thoughts straight. Which was why she was hunched over a computer, in her 'jamas, at who knows what time it was, while mostly everyone else slept. Except for the guards, but they were friendly enough to let her work in peace.

She had been sleeping, _had been_ key phrase here.

She felt useless at the moment. After working on the soldier for weeks and she had barely made headway. The Winter Soldier was a mystery to her. His mind's hardware was wired a little differently than what should be normal, by any standards. She had a few ideas on how to go about helping, but another part of her was afraid the man was too far gone for any type of help. Which is probably why she was in the lab at such an unruly time.

She didn't mind giving up her sleep, her slumber was usually dreamless or nightmare filled. Apparently, jetting off halfway around the world to help the man who could've snapped your neck in in half, but hadn't, elicited some bad memories. Memories that she did her very best to push into very back of her mind.

"It's late," Cassidy slightly jumped at the voice. She was so drawn into her work that she didn't hear him stop behind her.

T'Challa came up beside her and glanced down at the work she was doing. "You should be sleeping," he said swiping through the pages of work she already completed.

"I would if I could," she muttered cynically. "I _was_ sleeping actually, but than I had an epiphany."

"And that was?" he asked looking up at her.

She realized he was dressed in workout clothing, his shirt sweat soaked, his chest rising and falling as if he had just finished running. He must of not been able to sleep either and decided to work out.

"Your team's research is-" she paused looking for the right words. "Phenomenal. You've covered nearly everything there is to know about Bucky." She sighed and swiped back to the page she was working on.

"There's nothing I can really tell you that you don't already know," she stopped and zoomed in on the brain scan she had attached to the brain. "His *amygdala is so inflamed, I wasn't sure what the structure even was at first, look at this." She zoomed in on *prefrontal cortex. "It's barely functioning. It's a miracle he had enough sense to seek help."

"What are suggesting, Miss Scott."

Cassidy took in a deep breath and opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. What was she even trying to say. Scratch that, she knew what she was trying to say, but she didn't want to say it. To finally voice her idea and have it hanging there out in the open.

"I need you to trust me," she finally spoke looking over at him.

"I thought it was clear we trust you," he said creasing his eyebrows together. "You're in the labs, middle of the night, and the Dora doesn't have you pushed nose first into the floor."

Cassidy scoffed, "I guess you have a point," she sighed. "I need Steve to trust me."

She thought about the tall blonde and nearly shuddered. He was cold and awkward, mostly reserved. Sometimes, he would stop in to check in on the process, but never stayed to long or even addressed her.

"What are you trying to say?" he asked standing upright and looking down on her with a slightly raised eyebrow.

"I've done the calculations and I think I've found a way to do this safely and without fully awaking him."

"You want to unfreeze him?"

"Just enough to-" she paused. How could she say this without sounding utterly insane. "Just enough to test-"

"Spit it out, Miss Scott." He said obviously getting frustrated.

"I want to test the words," she paused and awaited his reaction. He looked at her, not like she was crazy, but astonished. "I've seen the damage, but I don't know how it affects his brain. I was doing some research, before you came in and everyone responds to brainwashing differently. We know what the aftermath looks like, but-"

"We don't know how he directly responds to it," he finished for her.

"Exactly," she said letting out sigh of relief as T'challa nodded understandingly.

"How do you propose we do that without anyone getting harmed."

"That's what I was figuring when you came in," she said looking down at the computer. "I have some theories, but nothing for sure."

She looked at him unsure on what he would say next. He looked down at her research thoughtfully, not giving much away through his facial expression. She really wished she knew what he was thinking. When T'Challa finally looked back up at her she held her breath. He sighed and slightly shook his head.

"It is a fair proposition," he spoke slowly. "But, dangerous." she sighed, but he stopped her. "We can't take any risks with something like this. It was hard enough to bring him down the first time."

Cassidy assumed the first time was when he bombed embassy. "I agree," she said nodding. "But, if I can find a way-"

"If Steve agrees to it then yes," T'Challa said.

Cassidy slightly grimaced at that. That would mean her having to actually talk to him and for that to happen he may actually have to _acknowledge_ her.

"I cannot force him to trust you," he continued taking note of her grimace. "That is something you will have to earn on your own."

"I know," she said nodding as she slightly pursed her lips. "I appreciate you not thinking I'm insane."

T'Challa slightly chuckled and gave her a pat on her back. "My standards of insane have considerably lowered in the past year."

That caused Cassidy to smile. She guessed after going what he went through, that was fair. He turned, rested his body on the console and stared at the cryotank and sighed. She could see the gears in his mind turning and couldn't help but wonder what the man was thinking. T'Challa was a mystery in so many ways to her. He was pleasant with her, but very reserved and secretive.

She guessed that was fair though. She wasn't exactly dying to tell him her life story either. Mostly, what made her curious about the man was the fact he would disappear to who knows where at hours at a time. To be fair, he was a king, but she had a feeling it was something more going on. Of course, she wasn't in the position to be snooping out other people's secrets when she had one of her own now.

Her mind flashed back to the thick vanilla folder hidden in a suitcase under her bed. The file in question brought up so many things from her past, it was scary. _Most shield files were leaked out for the world wide to see_ , she suddenly thought. She couldn't of been the only one to see the info in the file. So, then it wasn't really a secret. She smiled at the resolve and allowed herself to relax.

"What is he like?" she asked after a few moments of quiet.

T'Challa looked at her mildly surprised. She asked Sam the same question, but everyone's perspective was different. Especially, if said person exploded the building that killed your father. She could only imagine what it was like for him. The Winter Soldier had killed her partner. The one person she trusted unyieldingly. The one person she could bet her life on.

The image of him laying lifeless on the floor with a bullet hole through his temple flashed through her mind and she swallowed thickly. She hated it. The feelings the memory presented to her. She felt hopeless and an utter loss of control. She liked having some type of control over her life. For example, she chose to come with Steve and help, even if he seemed to be partial with her. She chose to help the man who caused her life to come crashing down.

"I couldn't tell you what he is like on personal level," he paused for a moment. "He seems truly regretful for the pain he has caused others. He insisted on being put in cryo; to avoid causing anymore harm and for that, I respect him."

"He killed my partner," she mumbled quietly. "He killed him, without a second thought, but left me. Not only left me, _saved_ me even. I don't know why he did it or even how if he's so mindless when he's under, but it happened and since that moment I've wondered what would have happened if-"

"It's not healthy to think that way, Cassidy."

She looked over at him, but he stared forward.

"How can you live if you constantly wonder 'what if'?" he looked over at her, his eyes held understanding. "You can't change what has happened, but you can learn to live with the results."

"Have you always been this wise or has the past year taught you that as well?"

"I like to think it's because I've learned from my own experiences." he said offering a small smile. "Were you close to your partner?"

"I trusted him with my life," she said woefully. "I would've given my life for him."

"Then why are you here, helping the man who took him from you?"

Cassidy paused, before opening her mouth to speak. "Because, I'm upset about what he did, but I can't ignore the fact that I'm still alive and there has to be a reason why. There has to be reason why I'm still alive even though he should've killed me. I want to know."

There it was.

Hanging out in the open for the world to see or in this case just T'Challa. She let out a sigh and looked down her hands. She never really acknowledged why she chose to help the soldier. Instead, she focused on the fact she was helping him or at least trying to.

She wanted answers.

 **####**

"I want to start training again," Cassidy said to Clint as she sat down at the breakfast table. He looked up from his cup of coffee, slightly surprised, but quickly covered his astonishment and nodded.

"I workout in the evening, after dinner." He said looking back down at his coffee. She felt like she had a newfound sense of purpose now that there was a possibility she was actually doing something useful. She and T'Challa had stood up for at least another hour discussing the soldier. But, then he decided to retire and advised her to do the same, but how could she sleep after their conversation?

She was brought out of her thought as Steve entered the small dining area. He offered hello to Clint, but looked past her and quickly focused on the coffee maker.

"Morning Steve," she greeted cheerily, although on the inside she griping to herself. He offered a silent nod and focused on filling up his coffee cup. She paused and grimaced. What now? Cassidy opened her mouth to speak once more, but was at a loss for words.

"Cassidy is going to train with us tonight," Clint said downing the rest of the coffee in his mug. She thanked the heavens for Clint and even more for the fact Steve worked out with him.

That was just great.

Steve paused and looked over at the two. Cassidy offered a smile as his eyes swept over her. He looked very unhappy. "I don't mean to intrude," she quickly said as her smile dropped. "I-"

"Okay," Steve said cutting her off. "See you both tonight then." he set down the coffee pot with a 'clank' and exited the room a full mug in his hand.

Clint whistled and stood from his seat. "See you," he said as he set his cup in the sink and exited the kitchen.

"Bye," Cassidy said as she began to spoon cereal into her mouth. Now, she had to think of a way to get through to the man.

* * *

*Amygdala- involved with the experiencing of emotions.

*Prefrontal cortex- highly developed in humans and plays a role in the regulation of complex cognitive, emotional, and behavioral functioning.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

* * *

As Cassidy slipped on her gym shoes, she felt a new found sense of confidence. Although a few good years out of practice, she couldn't not admit that at one point, she had been pretty good at the whole spying and kicking butt thing. There was no doubt in her mind that tonight would be rough, physically and mentally. The last time Cassidy went to training was the last time she saw her partner alive and actually enjoyed doing field work.

She tied her shoestrings and stood from her bed.

She placed her hand on the bed and stretched her legs out. Just in case, she decided to stretch before meeting Clint down in the gym. Who knows, maybe they did all their pre-stretching in their rooms.

Cassidy paused and shook her head, _'or maybe you're worrying yourself about stupid little things to distract you from the big thing.'_

Yea, that actually sounded about right. Sitting in a now empty suitcase under the bed was the huge file with _The Winter Soldier_ scribbled on the front of it in messy handwriting. She decided she was going to tell Steve about the file tonight. Maybe, if he knew that she had it, he would trust her a little more. Especially, since she decided to share it with him. On the other hand, he could be upset and demand to know why she didn't say anything before now.

She stood upright and let out a sigh. It was now or never. She grabbed her water bottle off of the dresser and a towel for sweat, and made her way towards the training gym, a place she once told herself she was never going to go near again.

At first, it was hard to enter through the doors. It took a moment of nagging herself for Cassidy to go in. For a slight second, she even considered the possibility that she wasn't ready to train again. But, then T'Challa's words from last night played through her mind.

"You can't go wondering what 'if', Cas." she mumbled to herself before taking a deep breath and pushing into the gym.

"Hey," she was greeted by a sweaty Sam Wilson. He raised a hand at her as he padded over to the sidelines to grab a swig of water. "Cassidy, never see you in these parts." his tone was light and filled with amusement.

"Thought, I'd burn all the energy that's bottled up while I work." she replied going over and setting her things down beside her. "I'm meeting Clint," she paused. "And Steve, I think. I didn't know you worked out down here in the evening."

"Not usually," he replied wiping his brow with his forearm. "But, Steve said he wanted to spar so-" he motioned to the gym. "Here I am."

She nodded and wondered if Steve invited Sam because of her. As her eyes scanned the gym, they fell on Steve who was unwrapping his hands and walking away from the sparring area.

"Who won?" she asked turning back to Sam.

"Who do you think?" Sam scoffed going for another drink. "I did," he said.

Cassidy let out a small laugh at that and began to make her way towards the punching bags. "Hey, Steve." she said nonchalantly as she picked up the white tape and attempted to wrap her hands.

She tried to recount how to properly wrap her hands as she pulled the loose end and started at her palm. She made it once around her hand, but then stopped unsure on what to do next.

"Do you want some help?" Steve offered from behind her. She jumped slightly, a bit surprised and embarrassed.

"It's just been a while, that's all." she tried to explain, but it came out sounding pathetic. Steve nodded and with a moment of hesitation grabbed her hand. They were silent for a moment, as he undid what she wrapped and started again. "Where's Clint?" she finally asked after a moment.

"I think he stopped to check on Wanda," Steve mumbled as he motioned for her other hand.

"Wanda?" Cassidy asked raising an eyebrow. "Who's that?"

Steve paused, "You haven't met her." he said before continuing on. "She-she just isn't really a mingling person at the moment."

"Oh," Cassidy said with a slight nod. "I get it. Sometimes I just like being alone too."

"All done," Steve said ripping off the end piece and securing it.

"Thanks," she said grabbing back her hands. She looked up at the punching back and grimaced. Hopefully, she wouldn't hurt herself.

"Do you know what you're doing?" he asked after a few moments of watching her.

"Yea," she said placing her hands around the punching bag. "Like I said, it's just been a while."

Steve nodded and sighed. "If you need any help, um, I could help." he pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed again. "I just mean that- don't be afraid to-" he paused.

"I can totally come to you, if I have any questions." she finished for him with a small smile. "Got it."

"Yea," Steve said and made his way over to where Sam was.

'Maybe that's why he doesn't talk to you,' Cassidy thought to herself as she took a step back and began to work.

Her eyes flickered to Steve every so often. How was she going to do this? After a few minutes at the punching bag, she heard the door open. She glanced over her shoulder to see Clint entering the room and remembered Steve said something about 'Wanda'. She kind of wanted to meet Wanda now.

"Hey," she greeted Clint as he entered.

He gave her a raised eyebrow as she placed her hands on the punching bag to keep it from swinging back and forth. "You need to work on your form," he muttered walking over to where she was standing. Cassidy creased her eyebrows together in confusion. He seemed up set about something.

"Uh- yea, it's just been a while." she explained taking a step back from the bag.

"Keep you shoulders set," he said stepping in front of her and falling into stance. She nodded and emulated his position. "Good," he said relaxing. "I have to talk to Steve, can you manage on your own?"

"You know once upon a time, I used to be able to kick your butt." '

"You and I remember once upon a time very differently," he muttered the corner of his lips turning upward slightly as he turned to walk away. She eyed the two men out the corner of her eye as Clint pulled Steve to the sideline and began to talk to him quietly to him. She curious as to what they were talking about, but kept to her own. There were far bigger things on her mind.

This training was turning out uneventful. She had one lousy conversation with Steve and then the two remained on their respectable sides of the gym. She let out a tiny huff and stopped punching. She began to unravel her hands and discard of the tape. If she wanted some one on one time with the man, she would have to get one on one.

"Anyone up for sparring," she asked breaking up the two men's conversation. They both looked up at her mildly surprised.

Steve looked apprehensive to be stepping onto the sparring mat with Cassidy. She felt the same way, but a girl has to do what she has to do. Clint originally offered, but Cassidy turned him down by reminding him when they used to spar, he wasn't very fair or forgiving.

"Neither were you," he defended with a slight scoff. Steve tried his best to find a hole to bury himself into, but Cassidy wasn't having it.

"How about it Steve?" she asked. "Captain America's all about fairness, right?"

"Just tell me when your-"

"Don't worry, I can handle myself." she said lightly. She really couldn't though, but admitting that would have Steve refusing.

"Are you ready?" Steve asked as Cassidy fell into position. She offered a slight smile and nodded.

"Are you?" she asked jokingly.

Cassidy hit the mat with a hard 'thud' within a matter of seconds. Clint whistled from the sidelines as she forced herself back up and fell back into her defense stance. "Again," she said rolling her neck to stretch out the kink forming.

"Are you okay?" Steve asked breathing heavily.

"I'm fine," she reassured him. "Let's go again."

"That's not such a good id-"

Cassidy cut him off by attacking first. She spun and kicked him the side only causing him to stumble back, but he didn't offer a counter attack. She followed with a sharp punch, that was sloppy but did it's job. Steve rubbed his jaw and then caught the next punch she threw his way. The spar ended shortly after that with Cassidy once again on her back.

"That's enough," Steve said in an authoritative voice. "I'm done." he quickly stepped off the mat before she could say something.

"Not bad," Clint said to Cassidy as he stepped onto the mat and offered her a hand.

"What's up with him?" she asked pulling herself up. They both turned to see Steve leaving and Sam going after him.

"I don't know," Clint said turning back to her. "But don't take it too personally, we've-"

"Been through a lot," Cassidy finished. "Yea, I know. Trust me, I know."

Clint silently looked at her for a few minutes before speaking. "What happened to you Cassidy? I mean- you just left and I get your partner- but you aren't the type of person who just up and leaves, at least you weren't.

She looked up at Clint and sighed. "Hydra happened."

She gathered her stuff from the sidelines and exited the training room. She wasn't giving up on Steve just yet, there was one other thing up her sleeve.

Cassidy entered her room in a fit. She pulled off her sweat soaked shirt and kicked off her shoes. She was over heated, figuratively and literally. She placed her hands on her hips and began to pace the room. Thinking back to her talk with T'Challa, Cassidy huffed. She couldn't force Steve to talk to her, but she couldn't deal with this tiptoeing.

She dropped to her knees in front of her bed and pulled up the suitcase. Unzipping the bag, she pulled out the thick folder and stood once more. It was time for plan 'b'. Cassidy placed the folder on her nightstand and entered the bathroom. But, first she needed a serious shower.

As Cassidy walked the halls, she held the folder close to her. There was no solid plan 'b'. In fact, she was kind of making it up as she searched for the blonde; who had made himself scarce.

She ended up in the labs after being unsuccessful in finding Steve. Cathy hadn't made any real headway in her theory today. In fact, the more she worked on it the more it seemed like some delusion sleep derived self just made up to compensate for all the nothing she had done to improve 'Bucky's' situation.

Cathy stopped in front of the cryo tank and sighed. Hydra wasn't built in a day and neither was the winter soldier. She knew somehow, someway, all the messed up things done to the poor man could be undone. But, she somewhat questioned if she could actually be the one to do it. Maybe Coulson really only sent her because there was a small chance she wouldn't be harmed. She set down the file and placed a hand on the tank. No person deserves to be treated the way he was and she truly wanted to help him, ulterior motive or not. He deserved a life. He deserved the ability to choose.

The moonlight was caught in the reflection of the cryo glass and as Cassidy's eyes focused on the picture bouncing off of the tank she felt relief wash over her. Cassidy spun around to actually look out of the window overlooking outside and sighed deeply. Steve was sitting beside the panther statue that overlooked the jungle. Cassidy quickly grabbed the file and hurried outside.

She slowed as she neared him not wanting to too seem to overeager. A twig snapped underneath her shoe causing Steve to look back. Cassidy offered him a weary smile clutched the folder closer to her.

"I always thought this was a strange place to put a Panther statue," she said lightly. She hesitantly took a seat next to Steve.

"I was just about to go inside-" Steve said trying to stand.

"Please," Cassidy said quickly gently grabbing his arm. "Just- hear me out."

He hesitated but settled back down with a sigh. "The Panther God," he glanced up at the statue. "According to T'Challa the panther is very sacred."

Cassidy silently nodded and they fell silent. She picked at the end of the folder before taking a deep breath and handing the file over. "Here," she said quietly.

Steve looked down at the folder and then up at her. He took it from her and cracked it open. "This is all-"

"About the Winter Soldier," Cassidy finished for him. "Coulson slipped into one of my suitcases, I guess."

"How would he have this?" Steve asked a bit defensively.

"My guess is he picked it up while infiltrating a Hydra base, because I haven't seen this file since Shield fell."

"You've seen this file before?"

"The first report is written by me," she said quickly glancing up at him. She looked down at her fingers and sighed deeply. "The other ones I've never seen before. My guess is they were strictly written files so never were leaked or at least _I've never seen them before_."

Steve was silent.

"You can read them, I mean obviously that's why I'm giving it to you," Cassidy paused and sighed. "What I mean is- I know you don't trust me, but I need you to because I'm trying to help- Bucky," she motioned to the file. "I met him when he was the Winter Soldier and it wasn't the best first meeting, but because of him I'm alive. So, I guess in some strange way this is a chance for me to repay him."

She looked up at Steve hoping for some kind of response, but he didn't offer one. "Just, wait until I leave- to read it I mean." She stood and dusted herself off. "I don't blame him for anything, just so we are clear. I couldn't blame him even if I wanted to because it isn't his fault." She turned and left him with the file.

As Cassidy stepped back into the facility she took in shaky breath. She glanced back to see Steve staring out into the jungle. Her words still rang in her head. This wasn't a matter of what she could do for Bucky, Cassidy quickly realized. She had to do something for Bucky. Otherwise, she wouldn't be able to live with herself.

* * *

A/N: I could apologize for not posting in such a long time, but honestly I'm sure you all are used to it. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter and don't be afraid to tell me what you think.


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